The rest of the day, I fought off a migraine for as long as possible, but could do nothing this afternoon except try and cuddle my little boy while he watched telly. At least that is a constant in his life, as well as our lovely friends here. He has been telling me he is worried and confused. He sat up today and looked around him and said, "This is my home!", then outside and said, "That's my street".
Last time we moved, six months ago, we asked my mum to buy him a copy of a library book we found and treasured: "Where is home, little Pip?" about a penguin that gets lost, chasing a feather. She asks all sorts of creatures, from a whale to a sled-dog where is home, but they all describe their own. In the end, her mum and dad hear her singing sadly and come to find her, then settle her down to sleep. She asks them why they aren't going home. By reply, they sing this:
"Where is home, is it far or near?
Is a pebbly nest what we all hold dear?
No, home is where there's nothing to fear.
When we're together, home is right here."
What we've got to do is to make that secure nest for him wherever we are. Jesus said that if we build are lives around him, it's like building a house on firm foundations. His ancestors had to leave home and security behind many times, starting with Adam and Eve, when they had to leave the garden that God wanted us to have as our forever-home. Then, later in history, Abraham was given a dream of the future - children, although he was very old - and a new land. He gave the best land away and was asked to give his future away as well. He didn't try to hold onto anything - even his longed-for and beloved son Isaac, but offered all to God. On his faith, the nation of Israel was founded and the whole world was given a way to go back home through his descendant, Jesus.
We feel like we are battling giants at the moment to get us home to Oakdale. These ones are not benevolent at all. They are the 'insecurity' giant, the 'sleepless nights and nightmares' giant, the 'powerlessness' giant....But they can be brought down by a single sling shot of prayer. Prayers are answered. Check out the song on the home page. I switched on the radio first thing this morning and there was Stephen Curtis Chapman singing his heart out and my husband has just told me the same thing happened to him as he started to do the dishes tonight. I put it on the front page for him yesterday. I think it's more than coincidence and that God is telling us we are indeed on our way home, even if it's via the long road.